that puts her at an especially high risk of developing recurrent, and potentially serious, infections. She’s kept this news private until now out of fear it would attract negative attention. “I just never wanted to be the whiny, privileged girl,” she says. “Also, my image had been that of going out and having fun.”
Initially, Kesha sought medical care because she felt alarmingly fatigued and run-down on a daily basis, which she assumed was a consequence of overextending herself. “When you’re lucky enough to have a song that catches on, you’re just trying to keep up. I had a really hard time saying no to interviews or photo shoots because I didn’t want to let my one chance fall away by not being able to fulfill every request. It led to severe exhaustion physically and mentally,” Kesha says.
In her 2014 legal filing, Kesha alleged that Dr. Luke “cruelly and incessantly criticized” her weight. And in emails submitted to a New York court by Kesha’s legal team in 2017, he claimed that other people in the industry wouldn’t want to work with her if she didn’t lose weight: Dr. Luke wrote to Kesha’s then manager, “We all get concerned when she is breaking her diet plan… We have seen it happen multiple times...almost every day.
She clearly struggles with the question of whether to be forthcoming about a health issue—one that almost took her life—because she’s afraid of what people might say about what it. She doesn’t want to be seen as prescriptive about pregnancy. As Kesha insists and emphasizes: She firmly believes people should decide whether, and when, to give birth on their own terms. “I just was taking my reproductive health into my own hands,” she says.
“When you can find joy in things, let yourself feel the joy. That’s an everyday mantra for me.” Read Kesha’s cover story here.
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