Q: My partner and I have a great friendship with a neighbourhood couple. We have dinner together every few weeks and attend one another’s birthday parties. But he – one half of the couple – won’t stop touching me. It’s innocent – a pat on the bare shoulder; a kiss of greeting on the lipsA.F., North Carlton, VicSome people can’t help touching others: they’re the Touchy Muchies.
Other people can help touching others: they’re the Touchy Lechies. They’re hyper-sleazy, creepo types who get their kicks by giving people a gentle caress, a lingering hug, a quick massage that feels a little wrong, especially if they’re applying scented massage oil and taking their shirt off. Sometimes it’s tricky spotting the difference between a Touchy Muchy and a Touchy Lechy: they both invade your space, can be very annoying and make you wish that pepper spray was legal and available as a handy, quick-squirt keyring.If you’re absolutely sure your neighbour is an innocent Touchy Muchy, then just make up some personal stuff that won’t hurt his feelings. Take him aside and quietly say, “Look, I have to be honest: I’m not comfortable with people touching me.
Oh, and have I ever mentioned my highly contagious seasonal ringworm issue? Well, if I haven’t, I don’t want to go into the gory details, but, um … now’s the season.”
Tell him you are an Age or ABC groupie…..that’s worse than saying you have Covid😁